Summary
I have this friend who's five minutes late to everything. I've told him that if he would just shift his life forward five minute's, he'd be as punctual as...well, as me. But he says it's impossible for him to shift his life forward even one minute, and I've learned to accept that, spending the extra time quietly plotting his funeral, which I've arranged to begin five minutes before the hour. I, on the other hand, will be five minutes early to my own funeral. This will allow me to adjust the lighting, fix that "smile" on my face and make sure everybody's sitting where I told them to. Of course, the real reason I'll be five minutes early is because I'm five minutes early to everything.
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Later, Man
When should I arrive at a dinner party?
I went to a low-key dinner party recently, arriving approximately 15 minutes after the specified hour. And the hostess, instead of greeting me wit...See the full content of this document
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