Elliott Isn't Aware, but World Revolves Around Me

Summary

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Well, Elliott did it again -- forgot my birthday. You would think I'd get used to that kind of treatment, but it still hurts. After all, I'm the most important person in his life and I'm five, soon going to be middle aged. He did try to make up for it by getting me a cake, but how dumb can you get? A cake for a cat. Of course, I wouldn't taste it. It smelled bad. He knows I don't eat anything but Science Diet, hairball formula. I guess I shouldn't be too hard on him, his age is showing. His memory is so bad he would forget his head if it wasn't screwed on tight.

I don't know when Elliott is going to realize that this whole place revolves around me. When we first came here he and Wanda were known as "the Elliotts." Later they were spoken of as "that couple with the cat." He did get taken down a notch or two last week. They wanted to refinish the floors in my room, so they moved everything out -- even my food bowl. I was worried until I found they had reserved the only empty room for me. The Elliotts had to sit out in the dining area and make people walk around them until the floors were dried. I tried to tell him that a little humility was good for the soul, but I don't think he heard a word of it. They should never have let him have those hearing aids. Now when he doesn't want to hear you he has a built-in excuse: "Battery getting low."

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Elliott Isn't Aware, but World Revolves Around Me

You know how proud I am of my beautiful coat. I spend most of my spare time keeping it well groomed, but E...

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